First off let me say I do not believe in premarital sex as a general rule. My mother has informed me that I have a very misinterpretable thought in a previous blog and I felt this needed clarification. I'm going to throw this interjection in here for those of you who don't know this about me, but I was raised extremely christian. This is however a completely different story for a different time. Let's just say it led to a very confused mess of teenage years and a couple of stupid boyfriends I very much regret.
Ok well now that we have digressed pretty much to a completely different universe let's pull back to this horrible horrible phrase that is the title of this blog. Some of my stupidest life decisions and the decisions of people I know were made based on this logic. I went through my teenage years with this logic and I never really realized how much I was hurting myself let alone everyone else around me. The first time I can think of that I applied this logic was my 10th grade year. I had just gotten my license and I was at the mall with 2 friends. They didn't have their license yet and we all wanted to go over to one of the girls houses. I said you know what its less than 2 miles why not. Ok fine I didn't get caught, nothing terrible happened, but something did happen later that made me realize what a terrible idea it really was. (Ps yes my parents did find out, I am a TERRIBLE liar and I got my car taken away for welll about a week cause the bus experiment was a mess but this is another story for another time). When I was 18 I got hit by a drunk 16 year old. I have severe spinal nerve issues and back problems at this point and when the case eventually did go to court the kids father ended up paying an extremely large amount of money out of his business because of a stupid mistake his underage son made. Honestly, I could have put my parents in the same situation and I feel really really bad about that. I'm sure I have about 8 billion examples but I can't really think of any that aren't going to piss someone off. I'm sure you're not all sitting here thinking
My point being this: (haha that makes this sound like it's actually going to be a short paragraph doesn't it) I moved to Europe because I could. And I needed to get out of a really really bad situation back in CA. Yes every part of my moving here was an attempt to run away from the patterns that were forming again in my life. I only went back to school because it was the only way I could get a visa to stay longer than 3 months and it gave me something to do. Please note I hate loathe and despise school. I am a terrible role model children please note this. I fell in love with scuba diving and really my real passion is teaching. I adore teaching diving and kids in general. At this point in time I am finally ready to make my peace with CA.
No I haven't. No I am not moving back in with my parents, I have every intention of finding my own job and getting my AA from a CC there. But as much fun as Europe has been I need a chance to be grounded and actually start my life. I'm sure more updates on that will follow. Also, at some point in the near future, possibly tonight, I will tell you all about my date last night. Epic fail does not even begin to describe it. I also think I might have gif addiction issues.....
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