I know I have touched on this before and some of you know more than others, but moving 6,000 miles away really changes your priorities and makes you grow up so much faster. I frequently joke how much I hate being an adult, but it's true. I miss the days where dad paid for my bills and gas and I had no rent due every month, but at the same time I relish the independence. I choose where I am going and what I am doing and I am responsible for myself. Sure that means that when I stupidly loose my phone in a cab I have to suck it up and pay for it myself, but really that's not an everyday occurrence.
Things I do miss. I miss fighting with my brother over whether or not my feet are really on his bed when I go in his room to talk to him. I miss the blue tape line down the middle of our bathroom and TRUST me you could tell whose side was whose. I miss curling up in a ball on the couch at midnight after having a rough day and just crying and mom knew exactly how to make me feel better. Despite my complaints she is good at this sort of thing. And I miss my random adventures with dad.
Being back in CA during break actually did remind me of the things I miss. I know I say that I hate it all, but I don't. I don't think I could ever bring myself to live with my parents again, let's hope it never comes to that, but I wouldn't mind moving back there. Strangely, maybe because my 2 closest friends here are just as likely to end up somewhere else soon, but as much as I love Rome I don't really feel like anything is tying me here. Currently one friend is about to end up in London, one is headed back to Venezuela after graduating, one is headed to who knows where (apparently NOT Dubai).
Another realization I have had after living on my own and being a grown up is I am not opposed to getting married, settling down, having kids, a family, a house, a dog. Big emphasis on the dog part, I really want my own. Anyways, I do so want that. Maybe I'm finally growing up, maybe it's how I was raised coming back to haunt me, but yeah. I don't understand how that is ever supposed to happen. Men are idiots. I just can't see this ever working out for me.
On that same note this semester my friends have developed this fascination with OkCupid. Its this free online dating site and honestly it's providing hours of amusement. I just live vicariously through them though. Freaks me out too much. In reality the thought of ever sleeping with someone I wasn't married/in a very long term relationship with scares the hell outta me. Congrats parents you managed to raise a sensible child. Well I mean I know they don't agree, but hey let's take what we can get right? I could be a prostitute to earn my college tuition.
Point of this whole blah being that things do really come at a price. Being close to your family is irreplaceable but I wouldn't have the friends or experiences I've had. But living here there ARE people in California I miss. We will see what the next season brings. This past year has been a whole collection of interesting. Oh and if you are wondering what all the pictures are, I was having a fun flashback moment to when life was simpler, and playing with old pictures is such fun!